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Wednesday, July 31, 2002
"...But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently" - Romans 8:24b-25 i'm learning to be joyful right now. as happy as i can be with all that has come and gone... and all that is still to come. and as christian and satine say over and over again in moulin rouge, "come what may..." i am somewhat at peace... because i know this is the best for both of us right now. even still... my thoughts still wander... my heart still yearns... my human nature still wants, still has the need for companionship. but God has been teaching me... He has been showing me what it means to rely solely on Him... what it means to have no other but Him... what it means to trust in His plan for my life, and His sovereignty over everthing under the heavens... this relationship included. oh... and most definitely about patience. ;\ (see above verse) it has been an everyday struggle... every hour struggle... every passing moment struggle. please pray for me. for surrendering all. for patience. for an overwhelming peace that all will turn out to be the best in the end. for linda... that God would show her exactly what she needs to see and know. thanks...*sighsmile* xxx Monday, July 29, 2002 its crazy when something good turns unexpectedly on you for the worse. its like you're going on this long roadtrip. everyone is excited... singing songs, playing slug-bug, playing the license plate game. suddenly, the engine dies. there were no signs of trouble before... no indication of a breakdown. it just simply decided it didn't want to be an engine anymore... it didn't want to be the one that brought joy to its passenger as it brought them to their destination. its crazy i tell ya. because i only have questions right now... but no answers. i try to busy myself with things here and there... yet these questions, these thoughts, emotions, feelings keep seeping into every moment, every reality. i don't doubt God's sovereignty. i am simply human - unable, unwilling to give these things that i've held on so tightly up to Him. i know it comes with time - but that can take up to an eternity. *sigh* i worry. but not for myself. i fear. but not for myself. i pray. because that is all i can do... xxx Friday, July 26, 2002 things are different... and will be different for who knows how long. because of this... i am sad. but i don't despair... because i know there is a reason to all of this. i know God has a plan for where all this is going. i know that only through prayer and time... things will work themselves out. but no matter the end result - God is faithful, and He is most definitely good. hallelujah... i praise you Lord... comfort me, be with me, and carry me when i am too weak to go on. xxx Monday, July 22, 2002
my teeth are gonna be pearly white!
xxx constipated? check it! haha! xxx Sunday, July 21, 2002
i've been working out. can ya tell?! haha! yay! lindie's back from camp. i also added some new links - look to your right! xxx Friday, July 19, 2002 sorry i haven't gotten around to posting up my pictures yet. perhaps this weekend... hmmmm... but most definitely i'll get some up next week. how's that? sorry i've been MIA for a while... went back up north for a week long business meeting. it was boring as heck... and more often than not i was sleeping through them and getting capped on for doing so. isall good. got to spend some good times with the co-workers and family as well. zoe girl is soooo incredibly cute now! she says "mama" and "dada"... and she actually recognizes things by name! she's so smart! (haha - i bet all uncles say that about their cute nieces) :D when we all go vacationing in hawaii in dec... she's gonna be so much fun! i can't wait... going back home was great... comforting... peacful, stressless. but throughout my time at home, my heart was very unsettled. so many thoughts, emotions, doubts, fears surfaced... yet within all that... a realization of my 'self'. what i've been doing with my life... what things need to change... and how i truly need to focus on the good, the positives of my life, rather than the negative/depressing aspects. and learning through it all... that it is my decision to let those negative thoughts get to me, letting satan get me down... or to continue to look to my rock and my redeemer, Jesus Christ, who gives me hope and the strength to carry on... xxx Wednesday, July 10, 2002 oh! who wants me to work on putting my pictures up? i need to see if there's actually anyone interested... cuz if not... i might as well not put any time and effort into it. haha! please leave a vote in the comments. thank you very much. buhbye now. xxx wowzas. i haven't written in this thing for a loooooong time! well... last night on my ride home from westwood... i resolved that i would write in my journal. my journal journal. so i wrote in it last night... i guess the whole journaling thing carried over to today. :D anyways... what's been going on with me? oh not much. the usual. work... bball every night at wooden... hanging out with linda and swan... cooking... eating... poopoo-ing... yada yada yada. oh! on the topic of poop. its weird when i'm on the can. i can honestly say that i'm the type of person who doesn't feel "uncomfortable" much. i'm usually pretty secure in most situations... i don't break out in cold sweat for no reason at all... i'm never overly nervous our queasy... but... BUT... the one time when i'm really "uncomfortable" is when i'm on the john. not just any random time... usually just the day after i've had a big, hot, fiery, spicy meal. maaaaaaaaaan... i sweat, i'm short of breath, and my tummy gets feels like its gonna get sucked out my bunghole. hahahahaha. well thought i would share that with you all today. peesh outshide. xxx Tuesday, July 02, 2002 i've had a blessed last couple of days. friday - rode out to westwood after work and hit up the gym... my mascules have been shrinking due to little to no usage. :) met with some brothers and sisters of grace on campus for some worship and time in the word... then proceeded back to wooden for some ballin'. saturday - woke up early... met up with some riding buddies for some breakfast... then hit up angeles crest for about 4 hours of twisties. it was only my second time riding in the mountains... and i don't really realize how fast we go until afterwards. we were blasting around some turns at speeds up to *censored* mph! haha - don't want to scare any of the loved ones... but i'm sure that already did the trick. whoops =\ the weather was perfect... so i joined up with lindie and swan by the pool for some fun in the sun. the night ended with a spending spree at abercrombie & fitch (summer sale baby!)... and walks up and down... and up and down... and up and down 3rd street promenade. haha... it wasn't that bad, cuz it was with linda. she had bought me a ring for our anniversary, it was a size too big, but we simply could not find the vendor! errr... i mean... linda has a horrible memory and had no recollection as to where she bought it! :D sunday - attended evergreen san gabriel valley church. i really liked it for its warm, family oriented atmosphere. was denied by quizno's (closed) for lunch, so we gave its competitor subway some business. ha! watched 'a knight's tale'... then played bball and did laundry. monday - called in sick to work because my lower back started hurting the night before, and continued through the day. it is still sore and stiff. went to costco and 99 ranch for foodage. we wanted to get crest whitening strips but they were all sold out! :( watched 2 hours of back-to-back 7th heaven with swan... then had some good talking and sharing time. :) someone at work asked me today, "what'd you do this weekend?" "uh... nothing." haha - now i look back on it... i guess i lied! whoops! didn't mean to! xD this summer is starting to look up! i'm trying to meet up with a brother or two every week. linda and i are cooking dinner together every wednesday. we play basketball almost every night (come join us!)... which means i'm getting fit. i've found some great riding buddies. i think i may have found a church to attend on a consistent basis (still need to pray about it). dave is moving to alhambra soon. i'm not pale anymore! and no work on thursday! God you are too good to me... :D xxx |
 name: joshua chiu age: 28 birthdate: march 26, 1979 height: 6 feet weight: 172.5 lbs. location: san diego, ca loves: God, family, kids, motorcycles, sports, music, deep-meaningful relationships, competition over video games, food - any and all |
