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Saturday, July 29, 2006
moving sucks! good thing i got most of the big things done yesterday, cuz its raining today! who would've thunk?! so i set up my room and my computer this morning to find out that we don't have internet! what the heck! c'mon guys, you GOTTA have the big I man. so right now i'm at the mira mesa library checking email, changing my address on all my credit cards, etc. yeah much fun. still have a lot of unpacking and settling in to do. oh yeah! praise God on my GRE! i rocked it! they give you 60-seconds in between each of the sections... and during each one i was praying so much. HAHA. well, not praying that i do well, but just prayers of surrender - dude, in the end, whatever school i get into, wherever i go, its all for God's glory anyways. so i just did my best, and asked God to meet me in the middle. :D my scores turned out better than expected. awesome! so thats one big weight lifted off of my shoulders. thank you for all of your prayers. you guys are such faithful friends. (: i'll update when i can. xxx Thursday, July 27, 2006 GRE test in the morning. and guess what? i feel sick - light headed, headache, cold sweat, feel like puking, etc. probably from that run i went on. yeah, 2 weeks and i'm already out of shape. need much prayer. please pray for me. :\ xxx Tuesday, July 25, 2006 "Who am I? That the Lord of all the earth, Would care to know my name, Would care to feel my hurt. Who am I? That the bright and morning star, Would choose to light the way, For my ever wandering heart. Not because of who I am, But because of what you've done. Not because of what I've done, But because of who you are. I am a flower quickly fading, Here today and gone tomorrow, A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapor in the wind. Still you hear me when I'm calling, Lord, you catch me when I'm falling, And you've told me who I am. I am yours. I am yours. Who am I? That the eyes that see my sin Would look on me with love And watch me rise again. Who am I? That the voice that calmed the sea, Would call out through the rain, And calm the storm in me. i am yours i am yours..." casting crowns - who am i GOD. i need you. i'm so burnt out right now... all these vocabulary words, all these math problems, all these anatomy terms muscles blood vessels bones blah blah blah. i'm tired Lord, give me strength. i'm stressed Lord, give me peace. i don't know why i'm even that stressed. i'm just sitting here... brain-fried... can't bring myself to do anything. i know the plans that you have for me! i know that! on the outside... i'm functioning ok. God, thanks for work... i love the people there and its always an 'escape' for me. God, i know that my future is in your hands... what do i have to worry? no need to... but inside... there are waves crashing, wind blowing... and i'm on a boat, just like the disciples... crossing an expanse of sea, not knowing if i'm gonna make it to the other side. Jesus, will you walk out on the water to me? man, i wish the essay questions for the GRE are to the effect of, "if you could write a prayer to God, what would it say?" my fingers would be going so fast. all my stress is currently manifested in my long hair, long mustache/chin fuzz, and pimples. i can't wait until this month is over. Lord... watch over my friends... those who are searching for you, knowingly or unknowingly. please reveal yourself to them - mightily, like a rushing wind. i want to get away. i want to NOT worry about these earthly things. king solomon said in ecclesiastes... that everything is meaningless under the sun! it is... yet, in our human condition, we still strive for the things of this world. your word also said that you give us satisfaction with the works of our hands... that we may provide for our wives, our children, our families. Lord, i believe this path will lead me to that satisfaction. please help me to surrender it fully to you. provide me a wife... so that i can have children, so that i can provide for them, so that i can praise you for those good things! please be with ben... as he's struggling with finding meaning... in you, in life, in oakland. please be with mom and dad as they are in LA ministering to others. please increase in me. please decrease my flesh, my pride, my ego, my wants, my needs. you know me, you know what i need. i need to eat. i need to drive. yes, a night drive. please meet me where i'm at. xxx Monday, July 24, 2006 wow, it is super humid here in san diego. it even rained! sucks, especially since i just washed my car! i feel like i'm back in the belizian rain forests! god, i miss that place. oh, and one of my anatomy tests got pushed back til next monday. whoo hoo! more time to study for my GRE. ok, off to work. casting crowns - praise you in this storm xxx Sunday, July 23, 2006  if i had held up a '6', this picture would've perfect! happy 62nd birthday old chap! thanks for being such a wonderful dad to me all these years. its true, you weren't around a lot of the time when we were younger, because you were out ministering and blessing other people's families and marriages. i respect you for that. as a result, God has blessed our family immensely... with new additions (zoe, ian, and now ethan), newfound faith in His sovereignty and provisions for our lives, and countless eternal treasures. sorry for being a difficult son at times... impatient, rash, and hard-headed. thank you for never forcing your opinions or even love, for that matter, on me... and most of all, thank you for being patient. i always knew, and still know, that you love me. i hope that our relationship gets better and stronger as i grow a little older and maybe even a little wiser. i love you dad! xxx Friday, July 21, 2006  xxx the night sky is incredibly amazing right now (yes i know, you LA folks just get to see smog, HAHA!). i barely noticed it with my light on and the computer screen glistening. turned them off, and wah-lah... trees, houses, fence silhouetted by the pale blue, yet darkening night sky. how often beauty is distracted by bright lights... how often our daily lives become distractions that pull our focus from God. i love souplantation. i took my books there, after a day at the mira mesa library, for some dinner, studying, and well... more dinner. (: i find that i need to go there at least once a week, since my bachelorhood meals only consist of rice, meat, burritos, chicken and hardly any fruits and vegetables. i just sat there... eating... people watching. i love how it is a place where families gather. perhaps its the open seating, that accommodates large families well. or maybe families go simply for the nutritious fare. its not like the fast food joints, or burrito hole in the walls, or nicer upper-echelon restaurants - where you tend to only see adults, couples, or college aged students. here... there are kids running around, infants screaming, and overzealous 10-year olds overflowing their soft-serve frozen yogurt cones. (: i like the idea of family. it pains my heart to see our country moving away from that. i love souplantation. :D xxx Tuesday, July 18, 2006 i like studying yes i do... i like studying how bout you?! thats all i've been doing lately... :\ i'll be more fun come august. peace... in the middle east... seriously. xxx Friday, July 14, 2006 The Spiritually Rigorous Saint "... that I may know Him..." — Philippians 3:10 A saint is not to take the initiative toward self-realization, but toward knowing Jesus Christ. A spiritually vigorous saint never believes that his circumstances simply happen at random, nor does he ever think of his life as being divided into the secular and the sacred. He sees every situation in which he finds himself as the means of obtaining a greater knowledge of Jesus Christ, and he has an attitude of unrestrained abandon and total surrender about him. The Holy Spirit is determined that we will have the realization of Jesus Christ in every area of our lives, and He will bring us back to the same point over and over again until we do. Self-realization only leads to the glorification of good works, whereas a saint of God glorifies Jesus Christ through his good works. Whatever we may be doing— even eating, drinking, or washing disciples’ feet— we have to take the initiative of realizing and recognizing Jesus Christ in it. Every phase of our life has its counterpart in the life of Jesus. Our Lord realized His relationship to the Father even in the most menial task. "Jesus, knowing . . . that He had come from God and was going to God, . . . took a towel . . . and began to wash the disciples’ feet . . ." ( John 13:3-5 ). The aim of a spiritually vigorous saint is "that I may know Him . . ." Do I know Him where I am today? If not, I am failing Him. I am not here for self-realization, but to know Jesus Christ. In Christian work our initiative and motivation are too often simply the result of realizing that there is work to be done and that we must do it. Yet that is never the attitude of a spiritually vigorous saint. His aim is to achieve the realization of Jesus Christ in every set of circumstances. God spoke through this Utmost for His Highest reading to me. we shouldn't go and do "christian" things simply because they're the "christian" things to do. but we should approach them with the attitude of becoming more intimate with Christ. its a different way to look at every aspect of our lives - looking for Jesus rather than looking for things that we like/dislike/want/need. (: xxx Thursday, July 13, 2006 so i'm trying to post more, because supposedly the more i post, the more people read, and the more they read, the more they'll comment. i thought it was the more people comment, means the more people are reading it, and then the more i should post. someone said my mentality has been wrong, so we'll give this posting every half-hour thing a try. HAHA. so i'm taking an anatomy class. the human body is an amazing thing! i don't even mind the studying. anyways... i've attached a couple pictures. we're disecting a cat that we named bob marley. the reason for his name is because he has really matty hair, and its in clumps... almost like dredlocks! also, here is ralph (or ralphina)... whom we studied the our second day in class. these pics aren't for the squeemish! :) xxx i'm old. yeah, i said it. now there are 3 things that point me in that direction. first of all, everyone that i go to school with is younger than me. well, most everyone. when i tell my classmates how old i am, the first response i really get is, "wow, you're old". and usually it is followed by, "but you don't look it!" ok great... so you say i'm old, and as an afterthought, you try not to make me feel too bad. really, i only look like i'm 12 cuz i'm asian. eh, whatever, i'll take it. secondly, i often catch myself thinking that i'm 28. i don't know why... but for some odd reason, my mind wants me to be a year older! what the freak?! you know what they say, the 30's are the new 20's. crap, i'm fast approaching that "hill". :/ thirdly... i'm tired all the time. it used to be that i could survive on 5-6 hours of sleep and be fine through the day. now... i need at least 8 hours, or i am barely functioning. its true what they say... the older you get, the early you go to bed. man... if 8 hours is what i need... i'd better start hitting the sack somewhere in the area of 10:30 and 11. ah, but there's so much to do... so on the topic of age and weariness, i realized something. thinking back to freshman year, and rowing crew... i could see that my body defintely was young, vibrant, and able to handle the vigrous stresses of being a lean, mean, atheletic machine. (: BUT, i could see that mentally, i couldn't hack it - i wouldn't want to get out of bed, i'd complain under my breath during the workouts, etc. sure i'm a little older now, and my body proooobably can't perform at as high of a level, but mentally i believe i'm at my peak - in terms of discipline. i overheard a 30-something one time in the gym telling his friend how he's in better shape than most 20 year olds... simply because they lack the mental discipline. so my question is... am i in my prime right now? where i'm physically and mentally "even" so that i'm able to run marathons, 10k's, be in the best shape of my life, etc.? i don't even want to think about that day (crap, thinking about it right now) when i realize i can no longer hang with those kids on the basketball courts, or hit the weights for 2 hours, or even stay up until the 10 o'clock news. good thing i look 10 years younger than i actually am... at least i have that. xxx Thursday, July 06, 2006 well, i'm officially an uncle 3x over now. (: my sister gave birth to a baby boy yesterday. 8 lbs. 3 ounces and 19 inches. they haven't picked out a name yet, so we'll have to wait a little on that. *edit: ethan timothy wong!* ok, now the crazy story... my sister woke up with contractions. so her and jonathan woke the kids and started over to mom and dad's place, to drop the kids off, before heading to the hospital. but once they got there... nuh uh... the baby wasn't going to wait! so my sister had her kid in my parent's living room, and jonathan delivered. MAN. that kid will have the greatest birthday story EVER when growing up. oh, i'm doing well too. really really busy. school 4 times a day at 8am is kicking my butt. the class being human anatomy, stuff that interests me and i actually want to learn, makes up for it tho. how are you? please comment, email, AIM, or call me. i'd like to hear from you. :) xxx |
 name: joshua chiu age: 28 birthdate: march 26, 1979 height: 6 feet weight: 172.5 lbs. location: san diego, ca loves: God, family, kids, motorcycles, sports, music, deep-meaningful relationships, competition over video games, food - any and all |